How To Handle A Player

Shane-L-Word2We all know them, or know of them. Every scene has them, running around, causing drama and let’s be honest… Hitting on any girl with a heartbeat. We’ve either dated them (or attempted to), woken up next to them after one too many drinks, or we’re in the safe zone of being one of their friends (skip to point 5). Luckily for all of you, our collective dating history resembles the Titanic roughly 2.5 hours after hitting that iceberg, allowing us to gather a great deal of information on how to handle, and most importantly avoid at all costs, The Player.


 1. Visual Aids

Shane Style

Annoyingly, there’s no one particular style which can encapsulate The Player. That would make them way too easy to spot and therefore avoid. It would be equal to them wearing a GIANT neon sign over their heads stating: Do not under any circumstances date me. Generally, they will be fashion forward or at least have some style. However, there are a few common personality traits that can aid you in spotting them. The most important? Cockiness. They will usually slide up to you with a look on their face which tells you that in their minds, they’ve already seen you naked, fucked you and sent you off before you’ve had the chance to reply “hello”. This very nature will, in many cases, actually lead you to be more drawn to said person and that is their greatest weapon; the sense of fun and danger that seems to follow them. Remember, it may be fun for a night, but the next morning that sense of danger will have dissipated.

2. Liar, Liar, Pants On Fire

pinocchio nose

Lying comes with the territory when you’re a Player. Juggling a large number of girls makes lies necessary. Even in the most trusting and loving relationships, little white lies are told to protect your partner’s feelings. Now imagine the scale of lying that The Player deals with. Having to please and keep more than girl at a time must be extremely trying, so we give The Player credit for that. She will be seemingly truthful about a few key things, leading you to believe that you can trust her… You can’t.

3. Commitment-phobe

Dancing girls

You will almost never see The Player with the same girl twice. She’ll be kissing a blonde girl one second, and an hour later there’s a brunette on her arm. When you’re into someone and they appear to be similarly into you, you might have the misguided belief that they will change their wicked ways for you, but we hate to break it to you… They won’t. Unfortunately, in many cases, the sweet things she is saying to you will have been said to whoever came before you, and whoever comes after.

4. The Escape Plan


Just let it go. Don’t let yourself get sucked into playing games (SO EASY). A lot of The Player’s power comes from their ability to manipulate situations and feelings. The more you allow this, the more power you give them, ergo the more power you lose and the worse you feel. Try to apply the advice you’d give to a friend to yourself in this situation and escape, fast!

5. Friendship AKA the Safe Zone 

Stay friends

Sorry to break it to you, but through careful observation it has been noted that there is no safe zone with The Player… None. Zero. Zilch. However many ways we put it, it all leads back to the same fact: No one is safe, not even if you regard them as your most trusted friend.

Is your girlfriend hot? Has The Player taken the time to ‘get to know’ her? Has she commented that she thinks your girl is pretty ‘cool’? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, then chances are, The Player has, or is currently kissing/having sex with your girlfriend… Go check the nearest bedroom (or in some cases, toilet stall).


Read points 1 through 5 and find a nice girl. Players will keep manipulating, lying, and sleeping around. If you've already been played, don’t worry - you'll end up finding happiness, while their selfish desires will most likely never be satisfied. Sit back and enjoy the show… Life goes on!




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